Hatchet II (2010)

Uncle Bob: "Come on you hatchet-faced fuck!"

By Adam Green
With Danielle Harris, Tony Todd and Kane Hodder

I remember how I met the first movie Hatchet (2006). It was through a contest of gore snapshots and one from Hatchet being particularly gruesome, I waited patiently to be able to find out the movie and when I did, I found it pretty funny, and gory obviously. So, a few days ago, I'm browsing movies and I see Hatchet III. I didn't even know there was an Hatchet II! So that's why I watched Hatchet II.

In Hatchet (2006), basically everyone was killed by Victor Crowley, except for Marybeth. Finally making it out back to town, she decides to rescue the bodies of her brother and father. Without anywhere else to go, she visits Reverend Zombie who holds the company that gave them the boat they used to go there in the first place. Reluctantly, Zombie accepts, thinking that if the legend of Victor Crowley vanishes his business will flourish. Zombie has a few conditions: he wants Trent and Marybeth's Uncle Bob to come along. With the promise of 500 dollars, he manages to gather a group of hunters and misfits with guns to go back to where the killings happened.

What is great about Hatchet, both I and II, is how it has a ton of references to the horror genre starting with the actors. We remember how Robert Englund (the one and only Freddie Kruger) was in the first movie, both I and II have Tony Todd (whose voice has been a staple of horror movies and particularly Candyman (1992)), then there's Kane Hodder (one of the many actors who have been Jason Voorhees, of Friday the 13th fame) and finally Danielle Harris (who as a child actor was already subject to one of the most cold headed killers on screen, Michael Myers of Halloween fame and who reprised a role in both the remakes of Halloween by Rob Zombie).

The film is off to a slow start, allowing the group, the legend and characters to build up before the gore sets in. When it does, it's pretty epic which I would attribute to the fact that the movie had issues getting a rating and ended up being released uncut and unrated, which for me tends to mean all the good stuff is still in.

Well, those killings are brutal and I've seen many. They are clearly over the top and politically incorrect, most of them are really funny though. The amount of blood spilled would make a heart surgeon blush. Victor Crowley has not an arsenal, but a toolbox of items to kill with and he makes an interesting use of it, like the scene where he decides it's actually funnier to use an axe on its blunt side.

A part from the killings and the funny moments every character has, the movie does not offer that much. Some of the characters are fun but some are just plain stupid. Fortunately, the main characters are quite good. All in all, it offers a pretty standard horror movie that gets bonus points for its classical horror figures, ultra gore action and a Twisted Sister t-shirt, that last one being a personal preference of mine. I don't think it was as good as Hatchet (2006), and I was bored a few times during the lengthy hunt, but overall I was entertained.

I liked: Louisiana swamps. Horror actors. Unrated and uncut.

I disliked: Overall not that memorable. You know they say "strength in numbers", then they all spread in little groups to "cover more ground".

57/100
Will please the gore fans, it has the merit of being a sequel with most of the same crew, including the director.